Why do I do this to myself?

Dammit, this happens to me all the time. I invite someone to something, and either they say yes and change their minds or say "We'll see" and fail to show. Meanwhile I have gotten myself all psyched, visualized introducing them to folks .... Then when the event rolls around and they aren't there, I enjoy it less.

It happened countless times with TJ. It happened at GottaGetGon with Digigal. And now it's happened with June C., who is not available to be the videographer at the Trio's wedding after all. Of course, the Trio had not given me an answer as to whether they would like a videographer, but that didn't stop me from visualizing how cool it would be to have her there.

I wish the disappointment were not so large as to cause me less enjoyment of events that are otherwise a blast. Being blown off is a blow to my ego. I wonder why these folks are not as psyched to be with me as I am to be with them.

I repeat, why do I do this to myself? Arrghh...